Elmo was released from jail today and seen back on the street. Sources say Big Bird bailed him out. He appears here more humbled by the experience and in need of money. If you see him (last seen by Runderdog on Park Ave. and 53rd), put a quarter in his red bag and tell him you hope he’s learned his lesson about being a showoff. Give Ernie and Kermit some airtime, dude.
That’s right. Your favorite Sesame Street character got arrested in Central Park today. Serves him right. Why’d he get arrested? He’s a ball hog. Stealing all the limelight from Miss Piggy and Kermit and Bert and Ernie and Snuffu-howeveryouspellit–luffagus. Also he was making obscene gestures. One too many. And the cops got mad and kicked him off his little stage just like Jim Morrison. That’s just fine with me. I always bark at Elmo. All big scary costumes should go to jail.